Being Single

I am being stalked by the married, by the engaged, by frivolous would-be brides if only they could find a man. Is it just me, or is it everywhere these days?

Marriage is a beautiful thing, this I cannot deny. And this is not to suggest by any means that I don't want to be married one day. Please... of course I do. Who wouldn't want to find that kind of committed relationship with the person who makes you whole? Everybody wants that... mostly.

But just because I'm 19 doesn't mean I should have a ring on my finger just yet. All too often I’ve seen my friends fret over finding 'the one' in college. Sometimes I can't help but wonder if that's why they came (in which case I would have suggested they checked our female:male ratio first). They’re only sophomores for goodness sakes, there’s still time. But just the thought that these young, beautiful girls already feel that they’re destined to be man-less and alone for the rest of their lives is insane.

I’m single, and my world isn’t coming to an end. Imagine that. I’m single and I’m still here. That is not to say I haven’t had my fair share of crushes (probably more than my fair share if we’re being honest) along the way. I most certainly have. I’ve chased the uncatchable with no luck. Heck, I’ve chased the catchable with even less luck. My problem was that I didn’t have standards. Well, I had them I suppose, they were just low.

But this is how we learn, isn’t it? I learned the hard way not to pretend to be someone I’m not just to attract male attention. Who wants to be in a relationship that was essentially based on lies, anyway? Not me. On top of which dating for the sake of dating doesn’t appeal to me at all. I’m looking for a special connection with someone, but at the same time, I’m not going to put my life on hold to look for it.

As far as marriage is concerned, like I said, I’d love to have that kind of relationship with someone. My parents have been together for almost 22 years and I’ve observed them and have come to understand that the most successful of all relationships are based on love, compromise and trust – and that’s exactly what they have.. and consequently, what I need to find before I marry.

But it seems to me that these days some girls aren’t looking for marriages at all. They’re looking for the dress, the flowers, the band, the balloons, the gifs, the groom that makes the bridesmaids jealous.. they want a wedding. Which bothers me. To me the wedding is only the ceremonial inception of a lifetime together with the one person that fills every inch of your soul with joy.

Alas, for now I’m single. And Valentines’ Day is approaching. Oh no! Not Valentines’ Day! The most miserable day of the year for the single, and the most awkward for the dating. I’m not bitter about it. I’m not the type to sit around and sob because I didn’t get flowers, but I’m not going to stuff my face with chocolates as I watch romantic comedy after romantic comedy and lament about how much I hate men. So this is my life as a single girl. And I don’t mind it.