41 days and counting

Mood: grateful
Happy thought: spring :)

So, today, obviously, is Easter. Happy Easter to you all :) Or, if you're not into the Easter thing, happy first Sunday in April. Or happy spring time. Or happy Gorge Yourself on Chocolate Day. Take your pick.

I'm at a friend's house in STL this weekend and having a delightful time. Her family is A LOT like my family which is really awesome. I've been missing my family quite a lot lately, so it is nice to spend time with people who remind me of them.

Anyway, lately I've been having really weird "what a difference a year makes" sort of moments. Like... a lot of them. But today I was just really slapped in the face with it.

Toward the end of last school year and all through the summer I had a really rough time with... everything. For every reason I could list out for you, I'd feel like there are four or five more reasons I just can't put my finger on. A lot happened at once and I didn't exactly handle it well... if I handled it at all, really.

But it all seemed to kind of start last Easter, so to find myself sitting in church again for Easter 2010 was a great relief. Trust me, I wasn't always convinced I'd make it.

I just sat in church and thought about everything that happened and didn't happen and changed and didn't change in the past year and it's really astounding. Again, there isn't a whole lot I can put my finger on, but things are so different now. For one thing, I feel tremendously happy. But also more... grown up, mature. I'm stronger, I'm smarter.

They say Easter and springtime are all about rebirth and, not to be corny or whatever, but in that moment I truly felt reborn. Like maybe I needed this Easter to make me reflect on everything really extensively so I can, at long last, close that chapter and start on a clean page.

It sounds weird, I know.