93 days and counting

Mood: Relieved :)

Tonight I went out to dinner with a friend. Her roommate is out of town visiting her boy in Chicago, and my roommate was occupied with a boy of her own, so we decided to take our single selves out and enjoy being in the presence of someone that doesn't make us want to vomit.

Pow-wows with this friend can last hours and hours and hours. I think our longest dinner outing was 6 hours. This one was only four.

I don't mind, though. We always have plenty to talk about.

She graduated from Drake last year and is in grad school now (also at Drake). I like talking to recent grads because I need to know what it's like on the outside. Adults can't give me that kind of information, I find. Mostly because they've been out for years and years and years, and can't relate all that well.

Anyway, we talked about pretty much everything from being absolutely, totally, 100% a-OK with being single (makes you wonder who we're trying to convince, right?) to the epic struggle of trying to find our place in the adult world. Deep.

Talking to her I became grateful that I know of at least one other person who is as conflicted as I am on a daily basis. I live in the world of pros and cons. I lay awake in bed at night, staring at the ceiling, mind racing with "Well, on on hand that would be good because..." and "On the other hand, though..."

It would be good to ask that boy out because maybe then you can date him... but do you really want to strike up a relationship when you have really tough decisions to make about your future? Won't he just interfere with that?

It would be good to stay in Iowa because you'll be making a lot of adjustments in your post-graduation life, so it'll be nice to have something that stays constant... but you came out here on a whim, didn't you? So maybe you'll love it somewhere else. Where's your sense of adventure? You should take advantage now while you're not tied down.

I'm so happy for my roommate; she's finally engaged... but I feel like my face is being rubbed in their relationship and I'm usually a third wheel in my own apartment.

All I've ever wanted to be is a writer. Let's look for jobs in writing... but the industry is bad, maybe we should put it on the back burner and pursue other options.

If I go to Burger King, I can get a cheeseburger... but you'll have to spend money and you said you'd save.

You can do anything you want... but what happens when you don't have the opportunity?

Let's look for jobs in Australia... but they have really big spiders there.

It never ends. But it's at least reassuring to know that I'm not the only one.