Farewell

After talking to people (and I mean all people who might even broach the subject of school - and they will), college begins to sound a bit like a terminal illness.

"How much time you got left?" they'll ask. And, no matter the answer, whether it be 3.5 years or only a week, they look at me with big eyes and take a sharp breath, as if I wouldn't believe the horror that awaits me on the other side. Like the real world is just waiting patiently for me, ready to crush my soul into oblivion, leaving me wondering what happened to my youthful spirit.

There's just all this pressure to figure "It" out. "It" meaning the future, our adult lives, plans... whatever you want to call it. And what's worse is that it's almost impossible not to buy into it, to become completely consumed by it all and consequently spent your dwindling days in the cushy (albeit hectic and incredibly stressful) college lifestyle panicking about it.

But here's what I learned: You don't have to figure it out. Not all of it. Not your whole life. What does that mean, anyway? Your whole life? I can't even wrap my head around that. And how do I know what I want? How am I the least bit qualified to know that after only 21 years? Heck, sometimes I don't eat dinner because I can't decide what I want. How am I supposed to make huge decisions for 40 years from now?

I don't know, but that's ok. Because I don't have to. Nobody ever figures their whole life out in one sitting. That would be stupid. Life isn't just a solid block of time. It's chunks. It's bits and pieces. And so we take it one chunk at a time. One step at a time. The high school step was four years, the college step was another four. Grad school will be another two... See? Totally manageable.

There's a lot to figure out. I've just started week three of post-graduation life, and already there are things to figure out. But I don't have to do that now. Some things, yes. Everything? No. I have nothing BUT time. Nothing but time.

I have my whole life. Don't you see? My WHOLE life. And I don't even know what that means just yet but now I think it's time for me to start finding out.

So that means, sadly, this is goodbye. It has been an honor and my pleasure to share my Drake years with you all and the, erm, well-rounded emotional experience that went with it. And now I turn toward, not the big, scary, capital-F Future, but the next little slice in the giant cake of life.

Mmm... did somebody say cake?