I Go Back

My RA told me that I shouldn't go back to visit high school. Actually, a lot of upperclassmen I came to know said that. Everybody said that in your head you're expecting it to be your triumphant return to your stomping grounds and you'll be welcomed back like a hero, but it actually just ends up being awkward.

Despite this advice, I couldn't not go back -- not after only one year away. There were people there I had to see and had to talk to and had to catch up with.

And, yes -- it was awkward, very awkward.

It wasn't so much the catching up part that was awkward because being with the people I've known for so long was great. I really enjoyed it. But walking down those halls again was weird. It didn't feel like home any more at all. It felt like I was a visitor, mainly because I was one, and being in that high school atmosphere was almost scary. I felt strange and self-conscious among the very same mass of students that I used to be a part of. But it really made me feel good after thinking about it because it means I've grown up and moved on (and much more quickly that I thought I would when I was graduating). And that was really reassuring after a while. The people there and the lessons I learned in high school are very much still a part of me, but the building is not. And I think that's the way it should be.

But, like I said getting to see the people that I haven't seen in months was great. I saw them every day my senior year and I took that for granted. And then, suddenly I was five hundred miles away from everybody and I didn't realize that I missed them so much until I came home.

Everybody I talked to, naturally, asked me about my first year of college and if I love it and all that stuff. And I don't know if it was the contrast between being in that high school setting and talking about college, but after talking to so many people I really walked away with the feeling that I absolutely loved my first year at Drake. And I knew that before, obviously, but after talking to everybody it became so much more apparent, I think.

My parents say that I would have loved college no matter where I went, though. And for the most part I agree with them. They say that I made the most of my time there and that's why it was such a successful year. But, I think the programs and people at Drake really played a large part. I feel like I did a lot of growing up in not a lot of time and I certainly have Drake to thank for that. Sometimes smaller schools are overlooked for larger ones, but they really offer some great opportunities that I honestly don't feel that I would have had at a larger public college.