Graduation

You know what's scary to think about? Graduation.

It keeps me up at night.

I'm only a junior but graduation is coming up and it's coming up fast. Three semesters is nothing. It's really not. 45 more credits, two capstones, and only three more journalism classes and that's pretty much it for me. From there it's job hunting, apartment hunting, and student loan payments.

Frankly, it's terrifying.

In some respects it's also exciting. This semester more than any other I feel so burned out and over school. I want to be done and I want something new and I want to be an adult. Or something. But I know I'll miss it when it's gone, so I shouldn't wish it away. Heck, I've got it easy now. Relatively. At this point though it just seems monotonous and endless. It's probably thanks to my classes. I'm not exactly thrilled with them this semester. They're loads of work but not rewarding and that's frustrating. It seems strange that change, something we all fear to some extent, can also be something we crave.

I'm ready, but I'm not. Not that it matters since I can't exactly make the decision to graduate tomorrow.

And it's not just my graduation that has me a little anxious. I know a lot of people who are graduating this year and I've known a lot of them for three years (two and half if you want to be technical) and just recently it hit me that they're going to be, well, gone. They're going here and there to jobs and grad schools. They're going to their futures, leaving me in my present and their past. I don't mean to make it sound so morbid. I mean I can pester them through facebook and things but somehow that's not quite the same. I'll survive and get over it of course... I guess I'm just not ready for it.