It don't come easy, it's a game of give and take

I'm not really talking about love. Although, I agree that this easily applies to love. What I'm really talking about here is school.

Last week I was feeling super overwhelmed. I just had a lot going on, I guess. And there's no one to blame but myself. I can pick and chose my extra curriculars. Anyway, everything was just piling up on me and I found myself sitting in one of my journalism classes (I think it was specifically my magazine writing class) and suddenly I started having all of these thoughts like "Why did I pick this major?" and "I can't do this, I'm not any good."

But then, I was really angry with myself for thinking those things. I mean, really. I got pretty angry at me. How dare I expect that the skills to be a magazine writer would just come to me over night? How could I think that I could just be born with the ability? I was upset because I was actually challenged. And that sucked.

That's how you learn, isn't it? By being challenged?

It was the first time I really questioned my major and I didn't like that feeling. I started blaming society and cursing it for making eighteen year olds pick out their whole life path. Heck! My biggest concern is how to register to vote right now and I'm expected to decide on what I want to do for the next forty years? That doesn't even seem right!

But then, I remembered, that I'm not bound to this forever. I didn't sign some contract saying that I'm going to study and practice magazine journalism for the rest of my life did I? Heck, I could get bored of that and move on. I've always had the idea that I want to teach in the back of my mind, but I'm not studying education.

What really bothered me, though, like I said, was that when things got just a tiny bit difficult for me I reconsidered my path. That's just so stupid! That's why I'm here! To learn the skills necessary! Just because and assignment or two doesn't come easy doesn't mean I'm not good.

I'm not going to quit something just because it's hard... I'm going to quit something when it's not worth the effort.

To quote my band director: "I never said it was easy, I only said it would be worth it." And I believe every word. I still love journalism. I love designing and writing and photography so that tells me I'm on the right track.